Stealing Time

Lately my life has been so busy. Moving house, single parenting, family get togethers, birthday parties, markets and planning a new shop. There seems to never be enough hours in a day. I sneek extra minutes wherever I can, whether it be sitting in the car waiting for the all-day car park to open and checking my emails on my i-phone while I'm waiting, to sitting on the bathroom floor with the laptop paying bills while Emily takes a bath. I jam as much as possible into my day because at the moment there is just so much to do!

I'm currently in SALE mode at Bearly Worn, getting ready for the endo of financial year and clearing the shop of stock in preparation for the closing down, renovation and opening of the new shop. I have some beautiful handmade clothing and today I put up a Facebook sale for C is for Cat who exclusively stocks Bearly Worn. You can check it out here.



I love her reversible Babushka Pinafores. They are the best thing for pre-school and birthday parties.

So I decided that I need a little relaxation at night and something that is just for me. I love retromummy's blog and taking inspiration from her last night I trotted down to the local Lincraft before work this morning and picked up a $2.95 pattern book and a couple of balls of wool. I'm going to knit Emily a jumper for next winter. I say next winter because it always takes me ages to knit anything! Jumpers are so expensive to buy new and if i can pull this off I will have a lovely pure wool jumper for Emily for under $20. Not bad....... 

This Thursday I have to go to Melbourne for two days to buy fittings for the new shop and meet with suppliers. I'll also be having a little R&R with my bestie Lisa. She always cheers me up and she's a foodie so we always go to an amazing restaraunt. We'll also be going to a comedy club after dinner and meeting some friends there. I really don't want to look like the frumpy single Mum I've been feeling like lately so I pulled out my absolute favourite shoes and it's been my mission this week to find something that goes with them.

Are these not the hottest blue suede shoes you've ever seen? Mollini baby!

In the whole hour I get to myself between dropping Emily at childcare and opening the shop I stopped off at Valley Girl to see what tops or jackets they had that would go with my awesome shoes. We don't get a lot of choice of shops in Albury and I don't want to risk waiting till I get to Melbourne to find an utfit.

I swear Mrs Woog was reading my mind this morning when she blogged about Retail Discrimination! Anyway I entered the shop just after the 16 year old shop assistant pulled up the roller door. She looked pissed off that she already had a customer and then proceeded to totally ignore me while I floundered around trying to figure out whether to get a jacket to go over a slinky black dress or a layered top look to go with some skinny black jeans. I left empty handed as it turns out a large at Valley Girl is equivilent to a small at Susan..... seriously.....

Anyway I'm open to all suggestions about the shoes and what would go with them. What would you do?

Derailed

I knew it would happen sooner or later. After the last couple of weeks, and the roller coaster that I've been on, I knew I would have to crash sometime.

This morning was the first time in years that I haven't wanted to get out of bed. I'm tired but I can't sleep. I'm shaky and teary and it feels bloody awful.

I've tried to concentrate on work today but I can't seem to still my mind. Too many thoughts are racing around. I'm thinking about Emily and how she's doing, my plans for the shop, whether I'll ever sort things out with my husband, will he ever feel better, will I ever forgive him, can I do the next market, will I be able to hold it all together?

It's all too much. I need to be still. I need to just be for a bit. I need the mundane, the boring, the norm, just for a little while.

I probably need some extensive therapy but a single Mums pension doesn't allow for that. Instead I have wonderful friends and family who come to see me, send me text messages and call me on a daily basis to make sure I am OK. They offer support, advice when i want it and today a thoughtful friend convinced me to close the shop for an hour, take some time out and enjoy some lunch together. Just two girls, some good food and a glass of wine. Just what the doctor ordered.....

The End of a LOOOOOONG Week

Thank God this week is finally over.....except tomorrow is Monday.

I have just worked 7 days straight...again! Today I had the Little Me Markets and it was full on from the start.

My stall set-up

Gaia Organic Cotton

Skeanie & Walnut Melbourne Shoes

Natural Blossoms Skincare

Squiggle Pop

Lots of little things for little ones

Now I'm home and relaxing in front of The Voice with a lovely stir fry. Emily is sleeping soundly and I'm really looking forward to slowing down the pace in the next couple of weeks and having some completely normal housebound weekends with my baby. 

Single Mum's Meal #1 - Baked Salmon & Broccoli

Since separating from my husband a couple of weeks ago one thing I've struggled with (apart from the obvious) is cooking for one and a half. Emily is not quite two and only eats a quarter of my dinner and a lot of the time I don't feel like mashed potato and peas (which is her favorite). 

So tonight I tried something different. And I've decided to start a series of recipes for single mum's who want something healthy, budget conscious and quick to make. 

Recipe #1 - Baked Salmon with Steamed Broccoli and Sun-dried Tomato's

Small Salmon Steak with Skin On

Small head of broccoli 

1 tbs of sun-dried tomato strips

1 lemon

50ml Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Salt and Pepper

Dill Tips

1/2 tsp crushed garlic

Pre-heat your oven to 180'C. Grab some baking paper and a small baking tray. Place your salmon steak in the baking tray and drizzle with some of the extra virgin olive oil. Sprinkle the top of the salmon with some dill tips (I used Masterfoods dried but fresh would be great if you have it). Season well with salt and pepper. Thinly slice the lemon (about 3-4 slices) and place them on top of the salmon. Now for the tricky bit. Take the two sides of the baking paper and bring to the center, fold down the top & tuck the ends so you've made a little parcel. Don't do this two tightly as you want air to circulate. Pop your fish in the oven and bake for approximately 30 mins or until the fish is cooked through. 

While the fish is cooking prepare your dressing. Squeeze the rest of the lemon juice into a jug. Add the remaining olive oil and season well with salt and pepper. Add the crushed garlic and stir well. Cut your broccoli into pieces and place in a microwave steamer bowl. I use a Decor one from the supermarket and it does a great job. Sprinkle with the sun-dried tomato strips and dressing. Add a tiny bit of water (about 10ml) to the bowl so your broccoli doesn't dry out. 

3 minutes before your fish is ready put your steamer of broccoli in the microwave and zap on high for 1 1/2 minutes. Check the broccoli and give it a toss. Put them back in and zap for another minute. That should do it. 

Then it's a simple matter of taking your salmon out the oven (it should be done), opening the paper and sliding the fish onto the plate. Add your steamed broccoli and viola! Amazing, delicious and healthy! 

The salmon cost me around $5 for the piece, the broccoli was about $1 and the sun-dried tomato strips cost me $3.50 but the jar will last me ages and I can use it in lots of other dishes. 

All The Small Things

It's funny how the small things in my life can bring me happiness at the moment.



Today Emily had her first hearing test and follow up to the grommets that were put in last Christmas. She of course passed with flying colors and will have another test and follow up in 6 months time. To celebrate I thought we should go check out the toy department at Big W. This also included a blackcurrant poppa (and I probably should have checked the ingredients before giving it to her).



Emily thought all her Christmas's had come at once, wandering through the isles and pulling balls off shelves whilst guzzling that artificially colored, sugar laiden drink down. Then she found the baby dolls. Actually it was a talking Baby Alive to be exact and some bright spark had turned it on. It must have had a motion detector in it because every time someone walks past it says or does something. Funny how they put it at the perfect height for Emily to find.



Anyway I managed to compromise with her and traded a $5 dolls outfit for her own "baby" and got the big talking doll back on the shelf.



Back at home later the effects of the poppa had fully kicked in and Emily was running around in circles around the lounge room. She also spent a good hour with my camera yelling at me to smile and say "cheese" before pretending to take my photo. I left the room for two minutes and Emily had managed to tip all the clean, freshly folded clothes out of the washing basket and was putting my tracksuit pants on her head when I came back.

Why can't you go out in a t-shirt as a skirt, Dora slippers and an evening bag?

What the hell do they put in those things? You'd think she'd just snorted an ounce of cocaine the way she sped around the house! 


Finally a reprieve with a bottle of milk and her "baby" had to have one too. It was very cute. 

With everything going on, both at home and the shop, it's moments like these that give me joy and remind me why I'm working so hard. This precious little girl is my everything. 

Renovations

Enough of the wallowing, self pity and all that crap that goes with it. 


Also enough of eating the chocolate because I'd hate to see the scales after the last week!


It's time to move, time to get on with it.


There's nothing like a new project to distract you from your own thoughts and problems. My little shop has been doing really well in some area's, not so good in others. Now that I am totally reliant on myself and I have a daughter to support I need the whole business to work well. 


I've made a decision. It's a little risky and a whole lot of work to be done in less than 8 weeks, but I'm doing it! I'm going to renovate, re-name and totally overhaul this baby. I'm keeping the stuff that works (i.e. the labels that sell) and I'm turfing what doesn't (i.e. the recycled clothing). 

I've spent today contacting new kids clothing labels to add to my existing range as I'll have to double the amount of stock in here. It's not easy finding them either, especially on a Friday afternoon. I'm looking at Australian and overseas labels and hoping that by adding all these in I will get myself a bunch of new customers and really make a success of this. 


Tomorrow I drop Emily off at her Daddy's for the first time since the separation. I know it will be hard but at least this time it's only a four hour visit and she'll be back for her midday nap. 


I'm getting my hair cut tomorrow and a new blonder me will emerge. I'm going to really concentrate on eating healthy because the last week I've done nothing but eat crap at night and watch bad TV. Lets hope my modem finally arrives tonight because having no internet at home is killing me! 


What are your plans this weekend? 

Moving

Wholly crap what a week! 


I have been struggling to come to terms with what's been happening and I've been going insane not being able to blog because we moved house on the weekend and there is still no internet connection. 


I'm taking five minutes out today to write something because I just need to get some shit out. 


So we moved on the weekend. It was sad and I didn't want to do it. People keep asking how's the new place and am I happy. the answer is no, I'm not happy. I want my almost perfect life back. I had a wonderful husband and a fantastic big dreamy house with enough room that I could have my own sewing/creative room and Emily had a big back yard to play in. Now it's just me and her in a little 2 bedroom unit and I'm doing everything on my own. 


Well not entirely on my own. My Uncle John drove an hour and a half from his place to help me and Dad load furniture all day Saturday. Mum looked after Emily all weekend and has been there every time I've needed a shoulder to cry on or to help me tackle the groceries with a toddler. My family has been fabulous. 


It's night time that's the worst. I'm lonely, I'm bored. No internet means I can't just blog away because tackling that keyboard on the iPhone does my head in. I've sent the iPhone battery dead every night this week reading my favourite blogs and wishing I could comment on the posts. 


I get random text messages from him asking about irrelevant things like what did Emily eat for dinner and why did I change our marital status on Facebook? He's stressing over the little things again and I've had to tell him to give me space. 


My emotions are all over the place. I'm angry, I'm confused, I'm disappointed, I'm revealed that he's finally admitted to having a problem, I'm hopeful of a resolution and a reunion. 


I'm grateful to all my wonderful friends who near and far have been a great support. One friend sent me this today and it was just so true I had to share it with you. 

I think I'm definitely in the one week later stage. Lets hope I look like the girl with arms outstretched months later. I think if nothing else this picture shows how resilient women are. We can do anything and we can also be a great support to each other.